Abbiejean "A.J." Malory Kane is the daughter of Lana Kane and Sterling Archer. She was born in San Marcos.
Character History
When Lana Kane becomes fixated on having a baby she secretly visits the sperm bank, examining many specimens before choosing a frozen vial provided by Sterling Archer. In part two of the season four finale, Lana reveals her resultant pregnancy, much to everyone's shock. Cyril, who recently resumed dating Lana after their break-up though under strict rules, asks when she was planning to tell him; Lana then reveals Cyril isn't the father. She tries to explain to a seemingly-cuckolded and enraged Cyril that the biological father is a donor, but is cut off when he escapes through the sea vents. Lana's pregnancy effectively ends their relationship and Cyril is infuriated at her for months.
For most of the fifth season Lana is pregnant and throughout said time she fosters her maternal instincts by "mothering" her friends even Archer who despises it. In each episode, she finds her patience being pushed to its limit by their crazy antics and begins regretting her decision to become pregnant. In the season 5 finale, Lana's baby is born in a Central American airport. Archer, who sought certification as a doula, helps deliver the baby though Lana screams at him as she believes he is responsible for buying the cocaine and even tries to shoot him in the face, however, the gun is empty. When push comes to shove, Malory comes to the rescue when Archer provides little support.
While on the flight home, Lana is finally able to pull Archer aside to recount the story of her visit to the sperm bank; Archer, however, tunes her out, instead fixating on the baby, who has begun to exhibit some of his mannerisms. Snapping to focus, Archer asks Lana what she's been talking about and she calmly introduces him to his daughter, Abbiejean. Though Archer disappeared for 6 weeks after A.J. was born, he admits he still plans to be a parent to her.
Archer was absent for the first six weeks of her life as he went on a crazed bender from shock ending up drunk in a south Asian country with a small deer in his motel and possible lady boys in the shower. She is largely protected from the antics and insanity of the other members sometimes violently like when Kreiger kidnapped her for his experiments in growing cyborg teddybear. She is currently the most protected member of the family.
Later in season 6 episode 7 "Nellis" Malory buys the rights to AJ's middle name and makes/changes her middle name two Malory. Though it was all an act, in Sitting Lana does unintentionally put her harms way hiring an actor/who did use a real gun, to test Archer's abilities as a father and protector of A.J. Though he succeeded in protecting her, he becomes angry that he got shot and that they put him through the whole rouse on purpose. In The Kanes, she finally gets to meet her maternal grandparents who instantly love her. Though the family event is ruined when Slater stages a burglary, not knowing she and her parents would be there.
This made Archer upset as well as Lana, when the opened fire with A.J. in the house. During the next few episodes, A.J. is judged constantly by Malory believing she's getting too fat in baby standards. Despite both parents' disagreement, she's shown to try and force A.J. on a diet. In Reignition Sequence, Archer threatens he will have her arrested if she tries to give her diet pills. Lana also angrily reminds her to feed her, fear that she's putting her on the diet.
Their suspicions were right, after being hung up. Malory tries to make A.J. have an ice chip instead of her milk. She'd appear in Drastic Voyage: Part I and Drastic Voyage: Part II, under Malory's care while Lana and Archer did a mission. During which due to the jeopardy of the plan, Lana reminds Archer that her parents are A.J.'s guardians. Archer still feels hurt by her statement and claims that A.J. could do worse for a guardian. To which the scene points to A.J. nearly getting an ashtray from a general.
Though he apologizes to Malory, she shrugs it off and says "She's use to it". Later flash backing, that A.J. got to enjoy some time with her step-grandfather Ron who was reading her Goldilocks and the Three Bears; but also while smoking in front of the baby. To which Malory snaps at him, though not for smoking in front of A.J. She snaps at him because she just cleaned the drapes, then kicks him onto the patio with A.J.
Then present, Malory states that she hopes A.J. will pick a smoking habit to help with her "battle of the bulge". Poor A.J. is then still forced through Malory's diet tactics, when she refuses to feed her. This forces Agent Holly, to feed her when Malory refuses. After the mission gets botched, she's seen being fed by Lana who's instantly suspicious of Malory again. When she asks why A.J.'s still hungry even after Malory claims she fed her. She instantly brushes her off and says "Who knows with her. A tapeworm?"
A.J. doesn't appear right away in season 7, though is mentioned several times. To which Lana mentions her as proof that she and Archer are in a relationship, when Shapiro tries hitting on her. His reaction upon learning of a baby, he goes "ewww", indicating he's not fond of children or at least babies.
She'd make her first appearance in Deadly Prep, now 2 years old. Lana and Malory are insistent in putting her in a very prestigious pre pre kindergarten school, believing it'll jumpstart her academics. Though Archer's alright with public school, he goes along for A.J.'s sake. Until he recognizes, a member of the board was his former bully, Ivy. And while its clear Ivy is rude, obnoxious, and makes racists remarks both at Lana and at A.J. Lana grins and bears it, and forces Archer to take a case for Ivy.
Though its clear that Archer is still uncomfortable, Lana reminds him to think of A.J.'s future and not ruin it for her. Out of love for his daughter, he does as he is told. Lana tries further to get A.J. into the school by hoping to meet with the dean. A.J.'s later seen in Pam's care playing with her. Unfortunately both ideas blow up as Ivy just wanted to set Archer up for murder and tried to kill him.
Meanwhile Lana's arrested as she's mistaken for a stalker. To which the dean immediately puts a restraining order on her. Archer is later seen at the prison, telling her that he thinks A.J. will be fine in public school. Because no matter what school she goes to, he believes A.J. is smart and will excel no matter where she is.
A.J.'s godparents are Lana's parents and would take guardianship of A.J. if Lana died. If Lana's parents also die, A.J. would go to Lana's sister. When Archer finally found out about this he at first argued before consenting that this arrangement was for the best. He at first wanted Malory and Woodhouse to raise her, but conceded that this was a terrible idea.
Notes
- When A.J. was first born, she exhibited similar traits of Archer such as raising one finger as a way to say "Just a minute" this was a definite clue that she was his daughter seconds before Lana confirmed it.
- Though Malory believes she'd be baby A.J.'s caretaker if something were to happen to A.J.'s parent, it's later revealed that if anything were to happen to Lana (and only Lana), custody of AJ would go to either Lana's parents, Lemuel and Claudette, or Lana's sister (who has yet to be seen/named). At first, Archer's against this, but after realizing what he and his family are like, he agrees that it's probably what's best for their daughter.
- In the episode Nellis, Malory suggests changing Abbiejean's name to "Malory" only for Lana to deny her however, Malory's "tears" and "sadness" ultimately force her to settle for letting AJ have "Malory" as a middle name. "Malory" is also Sterling Archer's middle name.
- Despite both Archer and Lana's objections, Malory believes A.J. is getting fat and is shown trying to put the baby on a diet. Others affirm to Malory that A.J.'s an average size for a baby. Archer has threatened to have her arrested on multiple occasions due to this tendency of hers
- According to Lana it has been mentioned that impregnating her with Archer's sperm was not her idea but Malory's. To which, Malory told Lana when confronted, "prove it".
- She was named after Lana's grandmother, Abbiejean. Who shares the same name as creator Adam Reed's grandmother.
- In "Deadly Prep" it shows that A.J. may have some interest in astronomy since she had toy space ships.
- In "Sitting" it can be seen that among A.J.'s things that there is a stuffed ocelot, possibly showing a fondness for the animal, or more likely a toy given to her by her father due to his extreme enthusiasm for wild felines and desire to share that with her.
Appearances
- Archer Vice: Arrival/Departure (S05E13)
- The Holdout (S06E01)
- Sitting (S06E06)
- The Kanes (S06E08)
- Reignition Sequence (S06E10)
- Achub Y Morfilod (S06E11)
- Drastic Voyage: Part I (S06E12)
- Drastic Voyage: Part II (S06E13)
- Deadly Prep (S07E03)
- No Good Deed (S08E01)
Gallery of Images
There are 26 images of Abbiejean Kane-Archer on this Wiki, visit the Abbiejean Kane-Archer gallery to view all the images and screenshots. Here is a sample from the gallery: